Friday, February 27, 2009

Focus

Well it is now two in the morning, so that means that it is officially Friday and my midterm week from hell is over. High note from this week include:

- Seeing an Asian kid have a mental breakdown in the Library and cry hysterically because someone stole his chair.

- Seeing a guy in one of my classes break down and cry in the middle of the exam. (Which might I add was not only sad, but horribly distracting.)

- Gym night from hell. I was at the gym yesterday and I bend down in the change room to tie my shoelaces. Along comes mister "I'm old and could care less if you don't like me walking around ass naked for the duration of your workout". He is strutting his stuff with out a care in the world, when someone tries to squeak by him. Being a gentlemen, he thrusts himself forward so to avoid and make room for this other man. Consequently, he thrust himself right into my face. Yes. That actually happened. A face full of old man. Good lord, even thinking about it is making me gag. This has been a week of tears.

I see only two solutions to all of this, which are to try and either drink the memory away or try and get some sort of counseling.

Side story time. My friends have all been joining online dating websites. It's apparently all the rage now. I, for one, see nothing wrong with this. I blog, twitter, use tumblr and pretty much live on the internet, so why would it be wrong to try and find a date online? I was never keen on the idea of it myself, but after seeing the amazing date my friend somehow managed to get, I decided that there could be no harm in trying it myself.

For my little experiment I decided to go with OkCupid. Everyone I know was using it and its free, so both criteria are met for me. So after uploading a picture, setting my preferences and writing a bit about myself in my profile they made me take a multiple choice test, so as to "narrow the playing field". I answered as honestly as I could.

When I was presented with my first page of best potential matches I was shocked. No joke, 4 out of the 10 women were gay and the rest were bi. What the hell? 40% of the women I'm paired up to talk to don't even find my gender attractive. There were a couple in there in which I would not ever be the least bit suprised if they were, in fact, not women at all. Screw you internet. If I want someone to question my sexuality and make fun of me, I'll go home and hang out with my step-dad.

God, option one is looking better and better the longer this week plays out.

2 comments:

Sebastian said...

Ah, to be back at university again.

Your exam story reminded me of a fun situation we ended up in...

We were about half way through a 3-hour paper and a guy to my right started frantically waving his hand, trying to catch the attention of the observers.

He was waving for a good few minutes before he finally ran out of gusto and... slowly fell sideways to collapse on the floor.

The observers hadn't seen anything, but half the room were now staring at this guy that was sprawled out on the floor, obviously in some distress.

What to do in such a situation? We all know that talking in an exam can get you disqualified...

So we just sat there, watching... slowly, one by one, we started waving our arms, until about 30 of us were all waving.

Finally the observers spotted us, and the comatose kid on the ground -- turns out he'd got a little excited from all the pressure and passed out. They helped him outside, and we all got back to writing feverishly.

True story!

lfar said...

Ooorrr. the ninja option. Just saying.

Also aren't there settings so that you only view straight females?